SLEEP ALL DAY, PARTY ALL NIGHT!

Zouked last night with Boey, Jave, Neal, Kit, Wendy and Surin, along with a bunch of other random people

Drank loads by the bridge before going in, and surprisingly, there were no fights this week!

=D

Lights came on around 4AM, then we went to Old Airport road for Supper! =D

Ate and hung out till 6AM before going home!

XD

KTV tonight!

Clark Quayed, Boat Quayed.

Met up with Irene after work yesterday and got our nails done at La Posh. We had gotten the deal off Groupon, and I must say the service was bad, and our nails were badly painted.

The Pedicurist had a fucked up attitude and couldn't be much bothered when she botched up our toe colours. She even got Irene's colour wrong! But the bad lighting of the outlet made it difficult for us to discern the colour.

UGHS.

In a usual Classic Mani and Pedi package, dead skin removal and scraping of nails after filing are standard SOP, as well as the application of cuticle oil after our nail colors are surface dry.

But in La Posh, our dead skins were not removed, nails were not scraped at all, leaving filed nail edges dangling with remnant nail filings and dirt and Irene had to remind the apathetic manicurist to apply cuticle oil for us. WTF.

I'm never returning there ever again!

Walked to Clark Quay after that, and we had a sudden craving for pasta at Waraku even though we'd just had dinner at The Soup Spoon 2 hours ago.

=/

We each had a Half and Half set, and gobbled it all down. =p

Then Wendy came, and we chatted by the Singapore Longkang. Two Japanese guys tried to chat us up and get us to go for drinks and dinner with them, but we declined, cuz it was so fucking weird!

Decided to adjourn to Clark Quay's Coffee Club for drinks because the noise was just not conducive for chatting.

Got tempted by the Quesadillas, and gobbled everything up even though it was pretty spicy and I could feel my lips swell. (I'm not a chilli fan.)

Hung out till 1am, and cabbed home.

EMO EMO EMO EMO.

I keep thinking that I'll die at 24. =/

When Zouk brings back old memories.

The night we danced and had your specs broken.

The night I went home with you and realised that you were the one I was looking for.

Past memories.

I brought Jia Xin and Alfred along. Met up with Jave, Kit, Boey and gang. Nine of us, we shared three bottles of liquor.

Midori and Chivas,

You love Midori. I prefer Chivas.

But that didn't stop the memories.

Dear Lord, remove all these pain if he is not the one, and get me the one ASAP. Thanks alot. I need someone to accompany me to church and he has to be the one I'm gonna marry. Sorry for the conditions, but I can't stand pussies other than my own. AMEN.

Alcohol solves all things.

Hormonal surge made me a raging mad bitch.

When 'I miss you' becomes, ' You-don't-care-about-me-and-don't-even-know-what-I'm-doing-all-you-care-for-is-your-games-and-online-sluts-I'm-dumping-you!'.

And that's how a relationship on the mend comes to an abrupt end.

Went out drinking with Jave, Boey, and Neal after that.

4pm till 3am.

We polished off endless bottles and cans of beer at East Coast Park, talked shit, and arranged for clubbing later tonight.

Love my Ducks.

If I can't have a boyfriend that treats me well, I'll just turn to my Ducks. At least friends won't fuck and chuck.

Read and re-read 1st Corinthians 7.

That fucker kept imposing his own views into the Bible at the end of the chapter from verse 29 onwards, and that pissed me off. It's not even from GOD. Even if it was WRITTEN, I'm sure it was written to self justify his own existence as a Single man.

Perhaps my understanding isn't deep enough. But, whatever!

I'm still gonna get myself a Husband material to get my own house to live in, because if I don't start now, I'll never be able to afford a flat in the future.

How I wish W.Q. was here right now to help me through another heartbreak.

=(

Not strong enough to go through this cycle alone again and again.

I need someone to help me break this...

And he continued being nice to me until Monday.

Then he started ignoring me.

This can only mean one thing. And that calls for a new Boyfriend.

He doesn't even know the modules I'm taking, nor my daily routines.

And we've been going on and off for almost a year?!

Geez man.

Seriously, get me a man who is interested in me as a person please!

AMEN!

I've blown $300++ on shopping alone this month.

All those clothes should suffice for now.

=D

Time to get back on my saving plan!

How I wish sometimes you could continue being so nice to me, but I know this is only temporary, because you felt guilty.

BUSY!

Spent the entire day at Lasalle yesterday, meeting the client and treating him to lunch.

REALLY NICE, LONG, LUNCH that filled me up the entire day!

<3 Japanese!

Anyway, we got a couple new deals and I'm experiencing a manpower crunch. FML.

*sigh*

Cass, thanks for being there for me!

XOMARTELLCHIVASOTARD <3

I still can't get over the fact that you have a weird fetish for MILFS.

It makes me sick.

Why won't you go for them instead and leave me alone?

I wish you would be honest with me and stop ruining me.

Dear Lord, WHY?! Can you please make my life right again and remove all these weird things happening around me? AMEN!

I'm very disturbed.

=/ So damn affected, it's worse than being raped.

I feel like I've been totally and utterly degraded.

=(

I think I've just about lost all trust and faith in finding a good man. For none seem to exist in my social circle now, and I seem to know too much about them to the point where they have all lost their attractiveness.

Broken rose tinted life of yours...

You said she was Barbie and fake. Yet you added her on FB, and chatted up with her.

For Christ's sake, she's SAMSON's EX GIRLFRIEND!

You went online to look for MILFS, yet you denied it.

Sick. Bastard.

Sometimes, I think for all that you've done towards me and my family, YOU DESERVE TO HAVE YOURS BROKEN!

But the nice, kind, caring side of me refuse to do that towards you, or allow myself to allow such thoughts to manifest in me.

Don't play with my feelings or try to fool me. Because in all things, there is still KARMA.


Do unto others, what you want done unto you!

I will be there for you until...

You disappointed me yet again. But why can't I bear to leave you?

I wonder again, if you would be there for me like I was there for you when you needed me.

You treated my ankles, and brought me out to eat. But what you've been doing behind my back, I can never fully know.

Without this trust, I don't think this relationship will work out.

You had your ground pulled out from you for the first time. I want to be there for you. But with your selfish behaviour, you'll probably have to live through it alone.

I don't wish to be your charity, and if you think your HABIT is more precious than me, then by all means, LEAVE ME ALONE.

Die with your damned habit and stop ruining my life.

=The Queen Bitch acted up and trashed my room on Friday.=

Went drinking on Thursday and sprained my ankle due to misadventure at 6th Ave's Lazy Lizard.

Tried to stay home the entire Friday, but the incessant chanting of "Bitch, Slut, Cheap." by the Queen Bitch drove me nuts.

Cabbed down to St James to meet Samson and Matthew and 9 other virgin clubbers - new recruits Samson had picked out in camp.

Opened 2 bottles of Belvedere Vodka, and they drank them neat. Shared a cab home with a guy, and got home to a trashed room. =/

Story of my life.

Wanted to club today, but the Lizard sent something stupid to my dad and ruined it.

Bumped into Zhao Ge, Neal, Boey, Jave and their friends. =D Bottomed up with them, and left before midnight.

Zhao Ge went to PK with this other guy and they shuffles their asses off! <3

*sigh* I had to leave the club even before I had a chance to really dance. Tragic.

But at least I had a very nice dinner at Wine Bar and Bistro. I would love to return there for dinner someday. =)

For a moment, I was actually happy in the company of my friends. Momentarily, I forgot his presence and the emotional distress he caused me.

I really want to know if he loves me. Which is stupid. Because everyone knows he doesn't.

*Cue Emo Chinese Love Songs.*

How I wish you really sincerely gave a shit.

sigh


My ankle's too swollen from the walking, and the alcohol has slowly run out. I'm sitting amidst mess in my room, having cut my fingers from today's episode, downing Vodka shots to ease the pain.

How I wish I was in a club, drinking in the company of my friends.

=(

IF only someone could give me a hug and make me feel safe again.

What's the purpose of you chasing me back?

What's your agenda?

I really wonder...

Met Johnson last night after class. We were supposed to head to Marine Bay Sands for some photo taking of the night scenery with his new DSLR but he missed a turn and we ended up at NUS instead.

=.=!!

Took random shots of the school, and sneaked into their Alumni Club House. =)

FUN!

Fooled around the school till 1am, (it's amazing how much the students love school there. They literally live there! Even without hostels!), then we took a detour to Woking Road, and saw blocks of quaint houses.

<3<3<3

How I wish I could live there someday...

Clothes are here!

HE REALLY BOUGHT THE CLOTHES! I'M GOING TO COLLECT THEM ON SUNDAY, AND TOMORROW!

<3 <3 <3

TODAY IS A HAPPY DAY!

Thanks for treating me right today. I'm happy. =D

*I love my Pull & Bear Shorts.*

<3

Sunday was spent chilling with Jave and Wendy at Ion's Star Bucks. Chatted for a few hours, bitched about men and relationships, before Jave had to go off to meet another bunch of girls.

Then Wendy and I went shopping around Ion and I bought 2 new pairs of Shorts from Mango and Pull&Bear, and a pair of earrings and some rings from New Look.

<3 <3

We talked alot, till late, before taking a night rider home.

=)

Thank you Lord for this day. Amen.

I'M SICK OF LOVING YOU.

WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT OF LOVING YOU WHEN YOU CAN'T EVEN LOVE ME UNCONDITIONALLY?

WHAT'S THE POINT OF BEING WITH YOU WHEN I'M NOT EVEN PART OF YOUR PLAN?

WHAT'S THE POINT OF WASTING YOUR TIME AND MINE?

WHY REAPPEAR WHEN I WAS STARTING TO FEEL HAPPY AGAIN, ONLY TO ANTAGONIZE ME WITH YOUR WAYS?

YOUR HABIT WILL NEVER GO AWAY, AND I'M SICK OF GIVING YOU CHANCES.

All I want is to be loved the way I want. Is it so hard?

Dear Lord, will I ever find The One? Someone who will love me unconditionally on this wretched Earth? Perhaps I'll never marry...

I'm Not Yours Lyrics

1, 2, 3, 4

Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth 
You're the only one that wants me around
And I can think of a thousand reasons why
I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I

Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth
You're the only one that wants me to die
And I can think of a thousand reasons why
I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you

I'm not yours anymore
I'm not yours anymore
No, I'm not yours anymore
I'm not yours anymore

Jump into your white mobile and run away
You're always leaving me behind
And I can think of a thousand reasons why
I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I

I'm not yours anymore
I'm not yours anymore
No, I, I'm not yours anymore
I'm not yours anymore

Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth
You;re the only one that wants me around
And I can think of a thousand reasons why
I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I 

For once, you took care of me.

For once, I felt that you took the effort.

But between them and me, would you really give them up?

I have my reservations.

Until the day it happens, I'll never be fully yours.

Joan Jett - I Hate Myself For Loving You [ Original HQ ]

Midnight, gettin' uptight. Where are you?
You said you'd meet me, now it's quarter to two
I know I'm hangin' but I'm still wantin' you.
Hey, Jack, It's a fact they're talkin' in town.
I turn my back and you're messin' around.
I'm not really jealous, don't like lookin' like a clown.
I think of you ev'ry night and day.
You took my heart, then you took my pride away.
I hate myself for loving you .
Can't break free from the the things that you do.
I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why
I hate myself for loving you .
Daylight, spent the night without you.
But I've been dreamin' 'bout the lovin' you do.
I won't be as angry 'bout the hell you put me through.
Hey, man, bet you can treat me right.
You just don't know what you was missin' last night.
I wanna see your face and say forget it just from spite.
I hate myself for loving you .
Can't break free from the the things that you do.
I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why
I hate myself for loving you.
I hate myself for loving you.
Can't break free from the things that you do.
I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why
I hate myself for loving you .
I think of you ev'ry night and day.
You took my heart, then you took my pride away.
I hate myself for loving you .
Can't break free from the the things that you do.
I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why
I hate myself for loving you .
I hate myself for loving you .
I hate myself for loving you .

Seeing you recurred the anger in me.
Your inability to make things right disappointed me.
A small part of me hoped that you knew how to make it right again.
But you don't.You never did. Perhaps your never tried.
When you vanquished from my life, I was left without a vice to destroy myself.
But I found my footing and grew from it. I became happier.

Like what Daryl once said, a happy person attracts all kinds.
And you're the last person I would seek to attract.

You can't love me the way I want to be love.
Your name and presence traumatizes me.

Parallels should never meet.
Crossing paths would only cause conflict.

Lord, guide me please. AMEN.

I'm coughing blood again. But my lymph nodes aren't swollen at all.

=/

I don't know what's wrong.

Been busy calling people up for interviews since yesterday but talking is increasingly difficult was this spasmodic cough.

The Lizard's re-emergence into my life is causing me emotional stress again.

WTF.

URGHS!

*Expletives*

I'm down with bad flu, which started with a sore throat, due to excessive second hand smoke inhalation while I was in Batam.

T_T

I need some TLC really badly.

Coughed my head off in class today, and used up 3 packets of tissue. =/ Felt so sick, even my scalp and hair roots ached!

BOOHOO~!

Business Stats was exceptionally hard today, cuz I was coughing my lungs out in class and my Ears and Nose were totally blocked. UGHS.

Tried to top up my EZ link card and couldn't seem to top up my card, only to realise that I had slotted in the wrong card into the wrong hole! =.=!

And I went away without my cards. WTF. I HAD ACTUALLY LEFT MY CARD IN THE SLOT AND WALKED AWAY, ONLY TO REALIZE IT AFTER EXITING THE STATION.

THANK GOD THERE WERE NO ONE AROUND TO STEAL ME CARDS! UGHS!

Anyway, I got the Lizard to buy me clothes on F21. IF the clothes EVER delivers.

We'll see.

I bought some new dresses online meself as well, and a luggage tag from Victoria Secret's!

This year, I will travel! =D

I'm getting to know more DJs from Zouk and Bouncers.

I'm breezing through the club cuz I'm a familiar face. I like that.

=)
We clubbed at Zouk the night before Batam, and Wendy stayed over. =)

Headed off to Batam in the early morning, and the smokers just never stopped smoking!

Batam was damn fun!

I went for massages, hair spas and facials at Eska Spa and it was soooo good!

<3

Drank an entire bottle of Bailey's alone while playing "I Ever" and "I Never", while the rest shared a bottle of Martel.

They smoked so much, I got a sore throat at the end of the trip. UGHS.

I miss that place already, and I can't wait for our next escapade! =)

Rebuttal. Because I find this entire thing STUPID.

What ever happened to "For better or for worst, till death till us part" the Sunday that you said that was the day that i thought i was able to get support from you to overcome the difficulties that i have with putting everything else away, but that didn't happen instead it wasn't me but you who ran away from it all. I'm not blaming u for it but don't get me wrong but asking why didn't this have to happen the way it did.


It happened the way it did because it was my BIRTHDAY and you didn't seem to get that or respect that. You took this opportunity to disgrace me instead. You made a fool out of me.
I had a dream of you last night saw you from a distance you seem happy with the current life that you have. But there seemed to be something missing at your mist and ur frantically searching for it. I cant make out what you were saying or doing. All I know that you were looking for something or someone. When I shouted out to you u couldnt hear me or even seem me but yet continue searching for what you were looking for till you got really close to me then I notice you were pregnant. I didnt know whose child it was and how you got pregnant. 


I'm happy being me, and IF I were ever impregnated with your child, Douche bag, I will make sure I KILL IT IN FRONT OF YOU. Having your child would be the WORST thing that could ever happen to me.


I'm searching for TRUE LOVE, and you were probably close to it, but DUH, YOU ARE NOT IT!
God IS.

Those days when I cummed into you i was praying very hard for you to get pregnant coz even if you say that I've always been cheating on you and such. Once your pregnant with my kid I will not go back on my word. And that is my final stand.

Come on! What makes you think that your infidelity would lead to fidelity upon a person's impregnation by you? Have you not heard of ' A LEOPARD NEVER CHANGES IT'S SPOTS'? You know very well that you'll always use your 'problem' as an excuse to seek other whores for sex. That's a FACT, and I doubt this will ever CHANGE.

Koh Cui Wen I still love you. I thought by not messaging you these few days since ur birthday i could forget about you, but a dream threw you back in my thoughts and I'm sincerely sorry for the pain and hurt that i have caused you the emotional and physical stress that i have brought into your life, your the only girl that had truly loved me for me. ( Oh wow, you mean you JUST REALIzED THAT? Isn't it TOO LATE?) Even tho you felt insecure coz of my past and past habits you continued loving me, I tried to overcome my flaws but couldnt and only thing i can say right now is that I'm sorry that I've had let you down and failed you. I may be the wash board in your life but I do not want to be the wash board in any other persons life yet to say to remain the arsehole in your life. 


I only need ONE asshole, and that is the one in between my buttcheeks to defecate. I don't need another one. Offer it to someone who needs it, like HER.


If you're not done messing up my life, I really think you need Psychological help, because you're really sick in the head.

Love, (Oh really? Or do you just need a girl for sex and NO ONE ELSE WANTS YOU?)
Calvin (I'll name a Lizard, Calvin, and KILL IT.)

<3 <3 <3~

Cabbed to Vinny's in the afternoon after work, and had a long long talk.

I think I should meet up with Vinny more often. =)

Went shopping with Wendy after that, and bought more bikini paddings and accessories + new bras. LOL.

Total expenditure today is around $100, I think. =/

I need my pay to come in ASAP!

Someone please pamper me! =(

Zouking again tomorrow! Gonna dance with Johnny again. He keeps me safe!

Let's hope there's no fucked up DJs spinning those hated songs tomorrow.

Dear Lord, I want to be a Tai Tai. AMEN.


=p